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Every perfect life is a parable invented by God.
Simone Weil
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Kazaam is a 1996 film produced by Touchstone Pictures and starring Shaquille O'Neal and Francis Capra.


  • Can you get me a Shaq Pack?
  • I have a really bald head without a single hair on my body!
  • This isn't the first time someone has asked me to do that.
  • I'm black.
  • I have to go now! I've spent too much time here!!
  • I am a big, beautiful, black WOMAN!


  • Give me junkfood from the sky!
  • Listen, Mr. Psycopathic dork in the basement, I don't think you're ordering anybody!


  • Believe it!!
  • I will Kick it HIGH OCTANE!!
  • Let's Green Egg and Ham it!


  • Jaquar black step back
  • One Large Two Medium, I'm Bout to Bust a Tedium
  • Outrageous, Contagious, spontaneous, you cant contain this, I AM KAZAAM!!

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