Can't Buy Me Love
People who are sensible about love are incapable of it.Douglas Yates
- [to Cindy] You can do anything you want, anything you put your heart and mind into!
- You ignored the Donald Miller geek for seventeen years, now you want to ride the Ronnie Miller express!
- [to his dad, about his brother] Here is the primate example. You're raising a doll-chopping homicidal maniac, and what do you do every time you see him? You give him money. Great!
- [Talking to Cindy outside her house] I need to talk to you. Every time I call you're either taking a bath, washing your hair or you're out of the country. That was a good one, by the way.
- Nerds, jocks. My side, your side. It's all bullshit. Its hard enough just trying to be yourself.
- Guys, take a look at my forehead... do you see a sign that says information?
- [to Ronald] Iris? Oh yeah, she's a big conquest. She's given more rides than Greyhound!
- Chuckie Miller: [about Ronald's card nights] Cards with the tards. Who could beat a night of cards, chips, dips and dorks?
- Patty: [about Ronald] I mean, he went from totally geek, to totally chic!
- Patty: [about Ronald] Like we're not supposed to know he's SPYING on us in his SPAZ-mobile.
- Quint: [walking into the New Year's party] Quinton is in! Let the fun begin!
- Jock: Look - it's a nerd herd!
- Patty: Cool outfit!
- Barbara: What a severe suede!
- Cindy Mancini: You guys, it's no big deal. Bobby sent it to me from Iowa. You know they have fine leathers down there.
- Patty: Oh, yeah. The best leathers come from Rome, Paris, and Des Moines!
- Ronald Miller: I'm going to a party. John Richmond's, with Cindy Mancini.
- Chuckie Miller: Cindy Mancini? Senior, captain of the cheerleaders, most beautiful girl in the history of this county?
- Ronald Miller: That's her. Well, I'm late, gotta bolt.
- Chuckie Miller: Bolt? Something stinks in suburbia.
- Patty: Didn't you like, used to mow our lawn?
- Ronald Miller: Yes, and you have the nicest pair of rhododendrons in town!
- Patty: Rhodo-who's?
- Cindy Mancini: Guys, I'll see you in home ec, OK?
- Barbara: What did he say?
- Patty: I don't care! Dig on his shirt...
- Cindy Mancini: The moon looks different now, it's not as mysterious or romantic as before.
- Ronald Miller: I'm sorry I ruined it for you.
- Cindy Mancini: You didn't ruin it, you just changed it I guess.
- Cindy Mancini: [to Ronald, after their fake break-up] Whatever happens to your popularity, stay yourself, don't change to please others.
- Ronald Miller: Me change? Never.
- Chuckie Miller: Chillin!
- Ronald's Dad: Shut up, Chuck!
- Chuckie Miller: I was talking to Ma!
- Ronald's Mom: Shut up, Chuck!
- Patty: Are you into long distance relationships?
- Ronald Miller: No.
- Patty: Now, then why don't you reach out and touch someone?
- [puts his hands on her breasts]
- Barbara: Why wouldn't we go out with Ronald. I mean he's cute and sweet...
- Patty: And good...
- [Cindy and Barbara stare at her]
- Patty: Come on, a lady never talks.
- Cindy Mancini: Well I'll have to remember that the next time I see one.
- Ronald Miller: What's his name, Biff?
- Cindy Mancini: Don't give me that! His name happens to be... Brett!
- Ronald Miller: Is there a difference?
- Chuckie Miller: You nuked my brother.
- Cindy Mancini: What?
- Chuckie Miller: You took him from "geek" status to "king" status to no status.
- Cindy Mancini: Chuckie Miller, right? He resorted to sending his messenger boy?
- Chuckie Miller: Boy? I see no boy here.
- [Cindy puts powder on his face]
- Chuckie Miller: You think you shut me up?
- Cindy Mancini: I didn't? Well, let me try again.
- [attempts to put lipstick on Chuckie, who leaves]
- Chuckie Miller: [to his friends] Babe said it was good for my complexion.
- Patrick Dempsey - Ronald Miller
- Amanda Peterson - Cindy Mancini
- Courtney Gains - Kenneth Wurman
- Tina Caspary - Barbara
- Seth Green - Chuckie Miller
- Sharon Farrell - Mrs. Mancini
- Darcy DeMoss - Patty
- Dennis Dugan - David Miller
- Cloyce Morrow - Judy Miller
- Devin DeVasquez - Iris
- Cort McCown - Quint
- Eric Bruskotter - Big John
- Gerardo Mejía - Ricky
- Ami Dolenz - Fran
- Max Perlich - Lester