Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then—one day—you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then—one day—you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe.Denis Leary
- This is Penfold. Codename: The Jigsaw, because when faced with a problem he falls to pieces.
- [As Penfold falls through the air at the end of the episode] Will it be Isaac Newton 1: Penfold nil? Tune in next time to find out!
- [Repeated line] Shush.
- [Repeated line] Oh, crumbs.
- [Repeated line] Si, Barone.
- [Danger Mouse has crashed through a brick wall]
Penfold: Oh, doesn't that hurt, Chief?
Danger Mouse: No, didn't feel a thing! [he faints]
- [Danger Mouse and Penfold are standing below the wall of Greenback's castle]
Danger Mouse: Um, hello? Excuse me? Can we have our ball back, please? I...
[a fizzing bomb is dropped into his hand]
Danger Mouse: Oh, thanks very much!
Penfold: D.M! Look out! It's a bomb!
Danger Mouse: Hmm? Oh yes, I know it's a buh-buh-buh-buh, buh-buh-buh-buh, a b-, a b-, a bomb!
- [Danger Mouse is being dangled over the snapping jaws of a crocodile]
Penfold: We could have had a weekend in Brighton!
Danger Mouse: I do not wish to know that, Penfold!
- DM: (Looking at sign on door that reads C.H.M.F.F.G.) Look, Penfold...look what it says on that door.
Penfold: Oh, yes..."Chi-muff-guh".
DM: "Chi-mu--" No, Penfold, it stands for 'Car Holding Magnetic Force Field Generator'.
Penfold: 'Cor...how'd you figure that?
DM: Mm. (confidentially) I read the script.
Penfold: Ooh, naughty Danger Mouse
- Colonel K: Good show, DM. Real Dying.
Penfold: Real Dying?
Colonel K: Oh drat I mean well done.
- DM: You must stop this, Master Lobsnit.
Lobsnit: Never, Never, Never!! Or perhaps onto the 2nd floor.
- Stiletto: Fancy you, I was just looking for...
Penfold: House of [laughs]
Danger Mouse: Don't take it easy, Penfold. This is no real person, this is the Baron's henchemen.
Penfold: Not Stiletto!
Stiletto: Yeah, Signora Mafiosa to you. Pleasent. So Sorry I can't wait to talk. Ulamanergick!