Dharma & Greg

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Sometimes we may learn more from a man's errors, than from his virtues.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
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Dharma & Greg was an American sitcom about a mismatched married couple. It ran from 1997 to 2002 and starred Jenna Elfman and Thomas Gibson in the title roles.


[before their wedding]
Dharma:: Can you see me?
Greg:: Yes.
Dharma:: Oh, I totally misunderstood that groom-can't-see-the-bride-in-her-wedding-dress-thing.

Greg: Were you this sarcastic before we met or is this something I have done?
Dharma: A little you, a little your mother.

[Dharma and Greg are having an argument]
Dharma: [holding an ice cube] Oh, look! I found your mother's heart!
Greg:: Melt it and we'll have your father's brain.

Kitty: I had to deal with a horrible mother-in-law! Do you know what that's like?
[awkward pause]
Dharma: I can imagine.

Dharma: Your mother is a lusty volcano waiting to erupt!
Greg: Okay, we have to establish some ground rules here. We never use the words 'mother,' 'lusty' and 'erupt' in the same sentence.

Kitty: And what do we think of the color?
Dharma: Apparently, 'we' don't like it even though 'we' picked it out.

[before a baseball game]
Abby: [trying to find out whether Greg is wearing an athletic supporter] Are you wearing anything to protect your genitals?

Dharma: You were the one who taught me to question authority.
Larry: [exasperated] I didn't mean me, I meant Nixon!

Kitty: You want to save the duck, you need to save the lake. You want to save the lake, you need to raise money. You want to raise money, you need to find some ninny to be man of the year.

Jane: What's new?
Pete: Life is empty and it has no meaning.
Jane:: I asked what's new.

[Dharma is worried Greg will die on his business trip. She's on the phone with him and he is trying to reassure her that he is all right]
Dharma: How do you know you're not in heaven?
[pause]
Greg:: Because Pete's here.

[Dharma and Greg are preparing to sleep on the roof of the apartment complex.]
Greg: Are we gonna sleep up here every night?
Dharma: Don't be silly. Only when it's a full moon.
Greg: Ah! The full moon, of course. You don't turn into anything unpleasant, do you?
Dharma: What? Is that supposed to be a joke?
Greg: Yeah."
Dharma: Well, it's not funny. [pause] Wouldn't it be trippy if I was really like that?

[Kitty is trying to get someone on the phone to do what she wants]
Kitty: Look out the window; what is the name on the building?
[pause]
Kitty: Yes, that Montgomery.

External links

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