Eddie Mair, Scottish journalist and radio and television presenter, known for his sarcastic style.
From PM and Broadcasting House
- [Concluding a slightly incomprehensible interview on financial affairs] ... remember, PM is not here to give financial advice. Your interest in the programme may go down as well as up.
- ...and if you want to hear more of that interview, fly to America and watch TV on Sunday night. - June 2003
- [Concluding a report about a car accident on Abbey Road, a street which appeared on a Beatles album] ... that was an item about a zebra crossing in North London.
- [Concluding an item in which a reporter asked random people on the street if throwing buckets of water at people was offensive, and whether he could do so] Moments later he punched her unconscious. [Pause] No, he didn't, don't send us letters.
- [Question to the Sudanese ambassador concerning the government's complicit stance towards Janjaweed atrocities in Darfur] Do you have any trouble sleeping at night? [Reply] No, sir. I sleep very well.
- [After an article attacking government policy] We asked a minister for an interview - you know the rest.
- [On organisations that issue statements on video rather than give interviews] "...makes my TV work look professional."
- [Mair was talking to a public figure on the subject of police investigations of allegations of homophobia against Sir Iqbal Sacranie. This person was quite hostile to the police action, and as he was speaking his mobile rang...] Mair: "That'll be the police for you now..."
- [Reporter waiting to be arrested on cycle-path (a woman jogger had been arrested and cautioned earlier that week)] "I've been waiting to be arrested all day. I'm disappointed!" [Mair replies] "We're all with you on that one."
- [After every single weather report on 'Broadcasting House' (Radio 4), no matter how sunny and hot] "...so do wrap up!"
- [After a tedious but far-away-sounding statement by David Cameron on the environment] "David Cameron there, just a short walking distance away from our microphone."
- [Before a long-term weather forecast given on Radio 4's PM] "So those of you listeners who don't want to hear what the weather will be like in six months time... look away now."
- "The population of the United Kingdom has, for the first time, reached sixty million. If they stood on each other's shoulders they would reach perhaps twenty feet in the air before toppling over." [PM, 24 August 2006 17:28]
From the PM Newsletter and Weblog
- "Our editor came to work today in a vibrant pink shirt. Vibrant. Several members of staff have had to go home sick." [Aug 2006]
- "In the Independent today, it says David Dimbleby will present Any Questions on Radio 4 tonight. And there's a photo of said David to prove it. Jonathan, if you're reading this, take them for every penny they've got." In fact Nick Clarke was in the chair for that edition, as reported on the day's online schedule . Commentors to the Blog suggested Nick should take the Independent for every penny... 18 Aug 06
- "... the judge in the Saddam trial appears to be wearing comedy specs and moustache." 21 Aug 06
- "Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the President of Iran ... in one shot on his website he appears to be dressed only in flowers. Oh - here's the page, you'll see what I mean." 22 Aug 06
- "Yesterday people were going past my window in t shirts and dresses. But that's the men at the BBC for you." 22Sept06
"As a Doctor, I'm often asked: why can't we see more pictures of Albania? [PM newsletter 28Jan08]