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Quotes about Golf

  • "Putts get real difficult the day they pass out the money." - Lee Trevino
  • "Golf is a good walk spoiled." - Mark Twain
  • "Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective." - Huxtable Pippey
  • "The average golfer doesn't play golf. He attacks it." - Jack Burke
  • "Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture." - Winston Churchill
  • "Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose." - Winston Churchill
  • "One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball." - Don Carter
  • "The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie." - George Deukmejian
  • "You can talk to a fade but a hook won't listen." - Lee Trevino
  • "Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result." - Tommy Armour
  • "The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course." - Billy Graham
  • "GOLF: The art of driving hard, avoiding the rough, surmounting traps and hazards, aiming straight, and arriving on the green at last, only to end up in a hole in the ground before your companions. The favored pastime of businessmen and their cronies, probably without a full appreciation of its metaphorical implications." - Rick Bayan, The Cynic's Dictionary
  • "Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing." - Ben Hogan
  • "The more I practice, the luckier I get" - Gary Player
  • "You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work." - Lee Trevino
  • "Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose." - Woodrow Wilson
  • "I look into their eyes, shake their hand, pat their back, and wish them luck, but I am thinking, 'I am going to bury you." - Seve Ballesteros
  • "Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill scoured by a whiff of arrogance." - Alistair Cooke
  • "It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course." - Hank Aaron
  • "Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead." - Tommy Bolt
  • "When it's breezy, hit it easy." - Davis Love, Jr.
  • "They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that." - Gardner Dickinson
  • "Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course." - Lee Trevino
  • "If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." - Bob Hope
  • " Golf isn't about how good your best shot is, its about how bad your worst shot is. - Anonymous
  • "If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron." - Lee Trevino


  • I don't mind taking a two stroke penalty, but I'm damned if I'm going to play the ball where it lies.
    • American golfer Elaine Johnson to tournament officials when a shot hit a tree and landed in her bra. Given by David Hardy in his book What A Mistake page 151.

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