How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (TV special)
Life is at its best when it's shaken and stirred.F. Paul Facult
- For the 2000 live-action film, see How the Grinch Stole Christmas (film).
- Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot,
But the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville, did not.
The Grinch hated Christmas — the whole Christmas season.
Oh, please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
Or maybe his head wasn't screwed on just right.
But I think that the best reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
- Then he got an idea. An awful idea.
The Grinch had a wonderful, awful idea.
- All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.
All the Whos were all dreaming sweet dreams without care
When he came to the first house in the square.
- Then he slid down the chimbly. A rather tight pinch.
But if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch.
He got stuck only once, for a moment or two.
Then he stuck his head out of the fireplace flue.
- Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
Around the whole room, and he took every present!
Pop guns! And bicycles! Roller skates! Drums!
Checkerboards! Tricycles! Popcorn! And Plums!
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grinch, very nimbly,
Stuffed all the bags, one by one, up the chimbly!
- Then he slunk to the icebox. He took the Who's feast!
He took the Who-pudding! He took the roast beast!
He cleaned out that icebox as quick as a flash.
Why, that Grinch even took their last can of Who-hash!
- It was quarter past dawn... All the Whos, still a-bed
All the Whos, still a-snooze when he packed up his sled,
packed it up with their presents! The ribbons! The wrappings!
The tags! And the tinsel! The trimmings! The trappings!
Three thousand feet up! Up the side of Mount Crumpit,
He rode to the tiptop to dump it!
- And what happened then...? Well...in Who-ville they say
That the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day!
And then the true meaning of Christmas came through,
And the Grinch found the strength of ten Grinches… plus two.
- And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light.
- He brought everything back, all the food for the feast.
And he, he himself, the Grinch, carved the roast beast.
- Welcome, Christmas, bring your cheer.
Cheer to all Whos far and near.
Christmas Day is in our grasp
so long as we have hands to clasp.
- For, tomorrow, I know... ...All the Who girls and boys would wake up bright and early.
They'd rush for their toys! And then! Oh, the noise! Oh, the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise!
That's one thing I hate! All the NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!
- Then the Whos, young and old, will sit down to a feast.
And they'll feast! And they'll feast! And they'll FEAST! FEAST! FEAST! FEAST!
- You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
You're a bad banana...with a greasy black peel.
- You're a monster, Mr. Grinch.
Your heart's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul.
I wouldn't touch you, with a...thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.
- You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch.
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile.
Given the choice between the two of you, I'd take the uh... seasick crocodile.
- You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch.
You're a nasty, wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk.
The three words that best describe you are as follows and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."
- You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch.
You're the king of sinful sots.
Your heart's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots,
Your soul is an apalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots.
- You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch.
With a nauseaus super-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked hoss.
You're a three decker saurkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.
- Grinch: And they're hanging their stockings!
- Narrator: - - he snarled with a sneer.
- Grinch: Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!
- Narrator: Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming.
- Grinch: I must find a way to keep Christmas from coming!
Why, for fifty-three years, I've put up with it now.
I must stop Christmas from coming… but how?
- Narrator: They would start on Who-pudding, and rare Who-roast-beast which was something the Grinch couldn't stand in the least!
- Grinch: And THEN they'd do something I like least of all!
- Narrator: Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small, would stand close together, with Christmas bells ringing. They'd stand hand-in-hand. And the Whos would start singing!
- Grinch: They'll sing! And they'd sing! AND they'd SING! SING! SING! SING!
- Narrator: And the more the Grinch thought of the Who-Christmas-Sing the more the Grinch thought,
- Grinch: I know just what to do!
- Narrator: - -the Grinch laughed in his throat.
- Grinch: I'll make a quick Santy Claus hat and a coat.
- Narrator: And he chuckled, and clucked,
- Grinch: What a great Grinchy trick! With this coat and this hat, I'll look just like Saint Nick!
- Grinch: All I need is a reindeer...
- Narrator: The Grinch looked around.
But since reindeer are scarce, there was none to be found. Did that stop the old Grinch...? No! The Grinch simply said,
- Grinch: If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead!
- Narrator: So he called his dog Max. Then he took some red thread
And he tied a big horn on top of his head.
- Grinch: This is stop number one,
- Narrator: The old Grinchy Claus hissed
And he climbed to the roof, empty bags in his fist.
- Grinch: And NOW!
- Narrator: - -grinned the Grinch -...
- Grinch: I will stuff up the tree!
- Narrator: And the Grinch grabbed the tree, and he started to shove
When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and he saw a small Who!
Little Cindy-Lou Who, who was not more than two.
The Grinch had been caught by this little Who daughter
Who'd got out of bed for a cup of cold water.
She stared at the Grinch and said,
- Cindy Lou Who: Santie Claus, why? Why are you taking our Christmas tree, why?
- Narrator: But do you know, the Grinch was so smart and so slick,
That he thought up a lie and he thought it up quick.
- Grinch: Why my sweet little tot,
- Narrator: - -the fake Santie Claus lied -...
- Grinch: ...there's a light on this tree that won't light on one side.
So I'm taking it home to my work shop, my dear.
I'll fix it up there, then I'll bring it back here.
- Narrator: And his fib fooled the child. So he got her a drink and he patted her head and he sent her to bed.
And when Cindy Lou Who was in bed with her cup,
He crept to the chimbly and stuffed the tree up.
Then he went up the chimbly himself, the old liar,
And the last thing he took was the log for their fire.
On their walls he left nothing but hooks, and some wire. And the one speck of food the he left in the house was a crumb that was even too small for a mouse.
- Grinch: They're finding out now that no Christmas is coming.
They're just waking up, I know just what they'll do.
Their mouths will hang open a minute or two,
Then the Whos down in Whoville will all cry, "Boo Hoo."
- Narrator: So he paused, And the Grinch put a hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low.
Then it started to grow...
But the sound wasn't sad!
Why, this sound sounded glad!
- [Whos singing]
- Narrator: Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any presents at all!
He HADN'T stopped Christmas from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
- Narrator: And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling:
- Grinch: ...How could it be so?
It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
It came without packages boxes, or bags!
- Narrator: And he puzzled and puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.
Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more."
- Boris Karloff — Narrator/The Grinch (voice)
- June Foray — Cindy Lou Who (voice)
- Chuck Jones — Max (voice)
- Thurl Ravenscroft — Singer (voice)