Kill Bill: Volume 2
Once upon a time in China, some believe around the year one double-ought three, head priest of the White Lotus Clan, Pai Mei, was walking down the road, contemplating whatever it is that a man of Pai Mei's infinite power contemplates – which is another way of saying "who knows?" – when a Shaolin monk appeared on the road, traveling in the opposite direction. As the monk and the priest crossed paths, Pai Mei, in a practically unfathomable display of generosity, gave the monk the slightest of nods. The nod was not returned.
Now, was it the intention of the Shaolin monk to insult Pai Mei? Or did he just fail to see the generous social gesture? The motives of the monk remain unknown. What is known were the consequences.
The next morning Pai Mei appeared at the Shaolin Temple and demanded of the Temple's head abbot that he offer Pai Mei his neck to repay the insult. The Abbot at first tried to console Pai Mei, only to find Pai Mei was inconsolable.
So began the massacre of the Shaolin Temple and all sixty of the monks inside at the fists of the White Lotus. And so began the legend of Pai Mei's five-point-palm-exploding-heart technique.
- Now, a staple of the superhero mythology is, there's the superhero and there's the alter ego. Batman is actually Bruce Wayne, Spider-Man is actually Peter Parker. When that character wakes up in the morning, he's Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man. And it is in that characteristic Superman stands alone. Superman didn't become Superman. Superman was born Superman. When Superman wakes up in the morning, he's Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red "S", that's the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears – the glasses, the business suit – that's the costume. That's the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent? He's weak, he's unsure of himself, he's a coward. Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race.
- Is that not the perfect visual image of life and death? A fish flapping on the carpet, and a fish not flapping on the carpet.
- I suppose the traditional way to conclude this is we cross Hanzo swords. Well, it just so happens this hacienda comes with its very own private beach. And this private beach just so happens to look particularly beautiful bathed in moonlight. And there just so happens to be a full moon out tonight. So, swordfighter, if you want to sword fight, that's where I suggest. But if you wanna be old school about it, and you know I'm all about old school, then we can wait till dawn, and slice each other up at sunrise, like a couple real-life, honest-to-goodness samurais.
- I'm a killer. I'm a murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to breaking the heart of a murdering bastard.
- You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person. But every once in a while, you can be a real cunt.
The Bride/Beatrix Kiddo
- Looked dead, didn't I? Well, I wasn't. Actually, Bill's last bullet put me in a coma, a coma I was to lie in for four years. When I woke up, I went on what the movie advertisements referred to as a roaring rampage of revenge. I roared and I rampaged and I got bloody satisfaction. I've killed a hell of a lot of people to get to this point. But I have only one more. The last one, the one I'm driving to right now. The only one left. And when I arrive at my destination, I am gonna kill Bill.
- My Pussy Wagon died on me.
- I was wondering, just between us girls, what did you say to Pai Mei to make him snatch out your eye?
- Bitch, you don't have a future.
- [To Esteban Vihaio] Where's Bill?
- [To Bill] You and I have unfinished business.
- That's right, I killed your master. And now I'm going to kill you, with your own sword, no less, which, in the very immediate future, will become my sword.
- Let me put it this way. If you ever start feeling sentimental, go to Barstow, California. When you get here, walk into a florist and buy a bunch of flowers. Then you take those flowers to Huntington cemetery on Fuller and Guadalupe, look for the headstone marked Paula Schultz, then lay them on the grave. Because you will be standing at the final resting place of Beatrix Kiddo.
- The venom of a black mamba can kill a human in four hours, if, say, bitten on the ankle or the thumb. However, a bite to the face or torso can bring death from paralysis within 20 minutes. Now, you should listen to this, 'cause this concerns you. The amount of venom that can be delivered from a single bite can be gargantuan. You know, I've always liked that word...”gargantuan"... so rarely have an opportunity to use it in a sentence. If not treated quickly with antivenom, 10 to 15 milligrams can be fatal to human beings. However, the black mamba can deliver as much as 100 to 400 milligrams of venom from a single bite.
- Ain't nobody a badass with a double-dose of rock salt dug deep in her tits. Not havin' tits...as fine...or as big as yours. I can't imagine how bad that shit must sting!
- That woman deserves her revenge. And we deserve to die.
- Wakey wakey... eggs and bakey.
- The Bride: How did you find me?
- Bill: I'm the man.
- Bill: Mommy is still angry at Daddy.
- B.B.: Why?
- Bill: Well, sweety, I love Mommy, but I did to Mommy what you did to Emilio.
- B.B.: You stomped on Mommy?
- Bill: Worse. I shot Mommy. Not pretend shoot, like we were just doing. I shot her for real.
- B.B.: Why? Did you want to see what would happen?
- Bill: No, I knew what would happen to Mommy if I shot her. What I didn't know is, when I shot Mommy, what would happen to me.
- B.B.: What happened?
- Bill: I was very sad. And that was when I learned, some things, once you do, they can never be undone.
- Elle Driver: Bill.
- Budd: Wrong brother, you hateful bitch.
- Elle Driver: Budd.
- Budd: Bingo!
- Elle Driver: And to what do I owe this dubious pleasure?
- Budd: I just caught me a cowgirl that ain't never been caught.
- Elle Driver: Did you kill her?
- Budd: Well, not yet I ain't. I shot her full of rock salt. She's so gentle right now, I could perform a coup de grâce with a rock. Anyhow, guess what I'm holding in my hand right now.
- Elle Driver: What?
- Budd: Brand spankin' new Hattori Hanzo sword. Let me tell you, Elle, that's what I call sharp.
- Elle Driver: How much?
- Budd: Well, that's hard to say, being that it's priceless and all.
- Elle Driver: What's the terms?
- Budd: Get your bony ass down here early in the morning, with a million dollars in cash, and I give you the greatest sword ever made by man. How do you like the sound of that?
- Elle Driver: Sounds like we got a deal. One condition.
- Budd: What?
- Elle Driver: She must suffer to her last breath.
- Budd: Well, that, little darlin', I can pretty much damn well guarantee.
- Elle Driver: Then I'll see you in the morning … millionaire.
- The Bride: I was wondering, just between us girls, what did you say to Pai Mei for him to snatch out your eye?
- Elle Driver: I called him a miserable old fool.
- The Bride: Ooh, bad idea.
- Elle Driver: You know what I did? I killed that miserable old fool. I poisoned his fishheads. And I told him, "To me the word of an old fool like you is worth less than nothing." That's right, I killed your master. And now I'm going to kill you, with your own sword, no less, which, in the very immediate future, will become my sword.
- The Bride: Bitch. You don't have a future.
- Bill: I was just admiring your sword. Quite a piece of work. Speaking of which, how is Hanzo-san?
- The Bride: He's good.
- Bill: Has his sushi gotten any better? [The Bride shakes her head] You know, I couldn't believe it. You got him to make you a sword.
- The Bride: It was easy. I just dropped your name, Bill.
- Bill: [chuckles] That'd do it.
- The Bride: You and I have unfinished business.
- Bill: Baby, you ain't kidding.
- Bill: Pai Mei taught you the five-point-palm-exploding-heart technique?
- The Bride: Of course he did.
- Bill: Why didn't you tell me?
- The Bride: I don't know … because I'm a bad person.
- Bill: No. You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person. But every once in a while, you can be a real cunt.
- Revenge is a dish best served cold.
- The bride is back for the final cut
- Kill is love.
- Back With A Vengeance
- Here comes the bride.
- The whole thrilling tale is revealed.
- Uma Thurman – Beatrix Kiddo/The Bride
- David Carradine – Bill
- Gordon Liu – Pai Mei
- Michael Madsen – Budd
- Daryl Hannah – Elle Driver