Mommie Dearest

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Life has its own hidden forces which you can only discover by living.
Soren Kierkegaard
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Joan Crawford portrayed by Faye Dunaway

  • I fought worse monsters than you for years in Hollywood
  • No wire hangers! What's wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you no wire hangers, ever?! I work and I slave until I'm half dead, and all I hear people say is she's getting old. And what do I get? A daughter who cares as much about the beautiful dresses I give her as she cares about me! What's wire hangers doing in this closet?!
  • You're nothing but a rotten, crooked lawyer...
  • Tina, bring me the axe!
  • When you polish the floor you have to move the tree.
  • I'm not mad at you, Helga, I'm mad at the dirt!
  • Scrub. Scrub, Christina. It's not. This floor is not clean! Look at it! This floor is not clean! None of it... this floor is not clean. Nothing is clean. This whole place is a mess!
  • Clean up this mess!
  • Figure it out.
  • Don't fuck with me, fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo!
  • I should have known you'd know where to find the boys and the booze!
  • Who wants to go swimming?
  • Ah... you lost again!
  • Ah, but nobody ever said that life was fair, Tina. I'm bigger and I'm faster. I will always beat you.
  • Don't you ever use that tone of voice again with me, Missy!...Who do you think you're talking to?!...I'll tell you what yo're going to do: You are going to march yourself upstairs to your room, and will stay there, until I tell you to come out!
  • I don't ask much from you, girl...Why can't you give me the respect that I'm entitled to?! Why can't you treat me like I would be treated by any stranger on the street?
  • Let's go!
  • When I told you to call me that, I wanted you to mean it.
  • Barbara, please! Please Barbara!
  • I can handle the socks.
  • It all comes out in the wash.
  • Mayer should know the price I pay!

Christina Crawford portrayed by Diana Scarwid / Mara Hoble

  • Adopted children are luckiest because they were chosen.
  • I wanna know... why did you adopt me?!
  • Because I am not one of your fans!
  • Maybe just a little true.
  • Does she? Does she...?
  • Jesus Christ!
  • No, go back. Strap yourself in. She'll kill me if she finds out.
  • But that's not fair, you're bigger than I am!
  • Then I'm not gonna play with you anymore...EVER!
  • Yes, Mommie Dearest. Uncle Ted.
  • I fix all of my uncles' drinks this way.

My character is only 28