Rik Mayall

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Great ideas need landing gear as well as wings.
C. O. Jackson
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Rik Mayall (born 7 March 1958) is a British comedian and actor.

Attributed

  • I don't consider myself a comedian…more of a phenomenon.
  • (After being hit in the groin with a cricket bat): Ha-ha missed both my legs!
  • My enormous penis, obviously.
    • on what he considers his greatest achievement.
  • "I found a shiny silver penny on the floor of my house today".(Rik Mayall after his quadbike accident)
  • "What does a man with a two foot cock have for breakfast. Well this morning I had a boiled egg"
  • "I don't like to talk about myself because i don't want people to know who I am."
  • "Whenever I'm nearta the theatre I ask myself this question "I don't know""
  • "Whenever I'm nearta a friend in the theatre I ask him this question with my eyes *Rolls eyes* He sighs, and replies like all the other guys... "I don't know""
  • "It takes more than a firetruck to stop Drop Dead Fred!"
  • "Who's up for snot flicking?"

"If somethings not working properly, the best thing to do is tear it apart to make it better."

  • In a debate with 'Vim Fuego' over weather cows are domesticated animals on the Bad News Album: "Oh, and how many cows have you seen sitting next to the fire, nestling over slippers Alan?? Not alot!"

"Oh go and fetch a paper from the newsagents Daisy!"

  • "I say, what a smashing blouse"
  • "Is my skid-mark showing?"
  • "You thorough and total wank biscuit!"
  • "Fire away duckie I'm all ears!"

External links

Wikipedia
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