Ross Noble Goes Global

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Ross Noble Goes Global was a British Radio 4 series, recorded between April and May 2001, which followed the worldwide travels of the stand-up comedian Ross Noble - he performed in such places as Belgium, Milan, Dublin, Australia and the Sahara Desert. With episodes half an hour long, and usually cutting between Noble's experiences (in public, in the places he visited) and the stage show (improvised, as always with Noble), the series was produced by author and broadcaster Danny Wallace.


  • "Welcome to Milan. Italy's notebook!"
  • "I'm being followed by a wolf."
  • "I don't mean to be a hypochondriac or anything, but I think I'm developing a hunch."
  • "It's a bit like being spat on by the Queen."
  • "I've seen some absolute rubbish in my time but that really would take some bottle. Let me just describe to you what I'm looking at now. This really is the finest piece of just wrongness, fashion faux pas you could possibly imagine. It's a lady's jacket, a hat and bag all with the patterns of the Bayeux Tapestry across the whole lot. That is so wrong it's unbelievable....I intend to buy four!"
  • [On Belgium:] "There is a bit of a Belgian look to people here."

  • "He's The Guy Who Just Says Weird Stuff And Walks Off Like One Time He Just Came Up To Me and Said "Sports Watch, Sports Action" And Just Flicked The V's At Me And Walked Off And I Didn't See Him For Like 2 Weeks"
  • Ross Nobles Sonic Waffle DVD.
  • "There's a muffin."
  • "Russell Crowe! He has a certain muffin quality! I wouldn't say that to his face!"
  • "Okay then, fuck "Jackie Chan style"... I didn't mean that to sound wrong!"