Sean Lock

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The sublimity of wisdom is to do those things living that are desired when dying.
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Sean Lock (born 1963-04-22) is an English comedian and writer who works as a stand-up comic and a television and radio performer.


  • A bit of advice: never read a pop-up book about giraffes.
  • If you can't masturbate to it, it's art.
    • On the art vs pornography debate
  • If you permed a fox I think it'd look a bit like Mick Hucknall. I actually think it'd be kinder to perm them than hunt them. And they'd be too embarrassed to go out and bother the sheep.
  • In 1926 the Queen Mother laid the first block of stone in our tenement. After a month or so the Council realised she was going to take forever so they had to let her go and get the builders in.
  • It's a statistical fact that you're more likely to crawl over a council tip and find a magic fridge.
    • On the chances of winning the lottery
  • The hardest job I ever had was doing the horoscopes for the Big Issue.
  • They say a woman's work is never done, maybe that's why they get paid less.
  • Interesting fact: a shark will only attack you if you're wet.

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