The Dukes of Hazzard (film)

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The Dukes of Hazzard is a 2005 film about the Duke family of fictional Hazzard County, Georgia. Based on the hit television series that ran from 1979-1985, the story centers on the Dukes' efforts to save the family farm from the nefarious money-making schemes of Boss Hogg and his cronies.

Directed by Jay Chandrasekhar
Written by Jonathan Davis and John O'Brien
Cousins. Outlaws. Thrillbillies. Taglines

The Balladeer

(actor Junior Brown)

  • "Jesse Duke has been to two places in his life: Hazzard County and Korea."

Jesse Duke

(actor Willie Nelson)

  • "The only way I'm leavin' the ranch is in a wooden box!"
  • Guy come out of an antique shop carrying a big grandfather's clock. Bumped into this drunk, broke the clock.

Guy said, "Why don't you watch where you're going." The drunk says, "Why don't you carry a wristwatch like everybody else."

  • "An apple a day will keep the doctor away, darling."

Roscoe P. Coltrane

(actor M.C. Gainey)

  • (To Cooter) "Boy, you couldn't fix an election if your brother was the governor!"

Daisy Duke

(actress Jessica Simpson)

  • "I think something bounced up into my undercarriage."
  • "Enos, where's Boss Hogg and Roscoe?" (Enos- At your farm) "Thank you Enos. That might be a new record."

Mr. Prickett

  • (To Daisy about his car) "She's faster than a cheetah on cocaine."


Jesse Duke: Know what happens when you give a politician Viagra?
Luke Duke: No.
Jesse Duke: He gets taller.

Jesse Duke: You know why tornadoes and blonds are so much alike?
Luke Duke: No.
Jesse Duke: At first, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house.

Jesse Duke: Know what you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
Luke Duke: No.
Jesse Duke: You get a piece of ass that'll bring a tear to your eye.

Jesse Duke: You know why divorces are so expensive?
Luke Duke: No.
Jesse Duke: Because they're worth it.

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