The Naked Gun
The Naked Gun is a series of comedy movies. The three films (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!, The Naked Gun 2½: The Smell of Fear, and The Naked Gun 33⅓: The Final Insult) chronicle the adventures of Nielsen's character, the bumbling police detective Lieutenant Frank Drebin.
- Lt Drebin, Police Squad! And don't ever let me catch you guys in America!
- The truth hurts doesn't it, Hapsburg. Oh sure, maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts.
- There is always risk. You take a risk getting up in the morning, crossing the street... or sticking your face in a fan.
- Like a blind man at an orgy, I was gonna have to feel my way out.
- Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes.
- And by the way.. I faked every orgasm.
- I'm sorry, I can't hear you! Don't fire the gun while you're talking!
- No, no, no I'm sure that we can handle this maturely. Just like the sensible adults that we are. Isn't that right Mr. Poopy Pants?
- Vincent Ludwig: Drebin!
- Jane Spencer: Frank!
- Frank Drebin: You're both right.
- Vincent Ludwig: Inspector Drebin, welcome.
- Frank Drebin: The feeling is mutual.
- Vincent Ludwig: Nice to meet you too... He offers Drebin some cigars ... Cuban?
- Frank Drebin: Err, no, Dutch-Irish, my father was from Wales.
- Jane Spencer: Can I interest you in a night cap?
- Frank Drebin: No, thank you, I don't wear them.
- Mayor Barkley: Oh Drebin. I don't want any more trouble like you had last year on the southside. Understand? Thats my policy.
- Frank Drebin: Yes, well. When I see five weirdos dressed in togas stabbing a guy in the middle of the park in pro view of a hundred people, I shoot the bastards, that's my policy.
- Mayor Barkley: That was a Shakespeare in the Park production of Julius Caesar, you moron! You killed five actors! Good ones!
- Rocko: What is your prison number?
- Frank Drebin: It's unlisted.
- Frank Drebin: That's the red-light district. I wonder why Savage is hanging around down there.
- Ed Hocken: Sex, Frank?
- Frank Drebin: Uh, no, not right now, Ed. We've got work to do.
- Tanya Peters: What are you doing?
- Frank Drebin: Oh! I was, uh, just conjugating my next move.
- Tanya Peters: Your bishop's exposed.
- Frank Drebin: It's these pants.
- Goon: Hey, Drebin! I've got a messege for you from Vincent Ludwig:
He talks rapidly while repeatedly firing is gun
- Frank Drebin: I can't hear you, dont fire the gun while you talk!
- Frank Drebin: Nice Beaver!
- Jane Spencer: Thanks I just had it stuffed <as she hands him a stuffed beaver>