West Side Story
In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there's no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on my bass playing abilities.Les Claypool
- [singing] I feel pretty, oh so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and gay,
And I pity, any girl who isn't me today.
I feel charming, oh so charming, it's alarming how charming I feel.
And so pretty, that I hardly can believe I'm real.
- How many bullets are left, Chino? Enough for you, and you? All of you. You all killed him! And my brother, and Riff. Not with bullets and guns - with hate. Well, I can kill too because now I have hate! How many can I kill, Chino? How many and still have one bullet left for me?
- [singing] I just met a girl named Maria, and suddenly that name
Will never be the same to me.
Maria - I just kissed a girl named Maria
And suddenly I found how wonderful a sound can be
Maria - say it loud and there's music playing
Say it soft and it's almost like praying.
- [singing] When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way
From your first cigarette to your last dyin' day!
When you're a Jet, let 'em do what they can
You've got brothers around, you're a family man!
You're never alone, you're never disconnected, you're home with your own
When company's expected, you're well-protected!
Then you are set with a capital J
Which you'll never forget till they cart you away
When you're a Jet you stay a Jet.
- Schrank: You hoodlums don't own these streets. And I've had all the rough-house I can put up with around here. You want to kill each other? Kill each other, but you ain't gonna do it on my beat. Are there any questions?
- Bernardo: Yes, sir. Would you mind translating that into Spanish?
- Schrank: Get your friends out of here, Bernardo - and stay out - please.
- Bernardo: OK Sharks, vamonos.
- Schrank: Boy, as if this neighborhood wasn't crummy enough. Now look, fellas. Fellas? Look, let's be reasonable, huh? If I don't get a little law and order around here, I get busted down to a traffic corner. And your friend don't like traffic corners. So that means you're gonna start makin' nice with the PRs [Puerto Ricans] from now on. I said nice - GET IT! 'Cause if you don't, and I catch any of ya doing any more brawlin' in my territory, I'm gonna personally beat the living crud out of each and every one of yas and see that you go to the can and rot there. Say goodbye to the nice boys, Krupke.
- Krupke: Goodbye boys.
- Riff: Now we fought hard for this turf and we ain't just gonna give it up...The Emeralds claimed it. We shut 'em out. The Hawks, remember, they tried to take it away, and we knocked 'em down to the cellar.
- Jets: Yeah, but these PRs are different. They multiply. They keep comin'. Like cockroaches. Close the windows. Shut the doors. They're eatin' our food. They're breathin' all the air. The end to free enterprise...
- Riff: Hey, you heard what that Lieutenant Schrank said, eh? We gotta make nice with 'em Puerto Ricans or else. We gotta let 'em move in right under our noses and take it all away from us, or else.
- Jets: No!
- Riff: You're damned right NO. So what are we gonna do buddy-boys? I'll tell ya what we're gonna do. We're gonna speed fast. We're gonna move like lightnin'. And we're gonna clean them Sharks up once and for all so they ain't never gonna set foot on our turf again. And we're gonna do it in one, all-out fight...The Sharks want a piece of this world too. And they're real down boys. They might ask for blades, zip guns...I say this turf is small, but it's all we got, huh? Now I want to hold it like we always held it, with skin. But if they say blades, I say blades. If they say guns, I say guns. I say I want that just to be the number one - to sail, to hold the sky...OK cats, we rumble. Now, protocality calls for a war council between us and the Sharks, to set the whole thing up. So I would personally give the bad news to Bernardo.
- Bernardo: Now I will not say these things to spoil your evening or to hear myself talk. I am here longer than you, Maria...Someday, when you're an old married woman with five children, then you can tell me what to do. Right now, it's the other way around. Now go to bed.
- Anita: [To Maria] He's the old married woman. [To Bernardo] You know, she has a mother. Also a father.
- Bernardo: They do not know this country any better than she does.
- Anita: And you do not know it at all. Girls here are free to have fun. She is in America now.
- Bernardo: Puerto Rico is in America now.
- Anita: Sometimes I don't know which is thicker. Your skull or your accent.
- Girl: [singing] Industry boom in America.
- Boys: Twelve in a room in America.
- Anita: Lots of new housing with more space.
- Bernardo: Lots of doors slamming in our face.
- Anita: I'll get the terrace apartment.
- Bernardo: Better get rid of your accent.
- Anita: Life can be bright in America.
- Boys: If you can fight in America.
- Girls: Life is all right in America.
- Boys: If you're all white in America.
- Girls: Here you are free and you have pride.
- Boys: Long as you stay on your own side.
- Girls: Free to be anything you choose.
- Boys: Free to wait tables and shine shoes.
- Maria: [singing] Tonight, tonight, it all began tonight, I saw you and the world went away.
Tonight, tonight, there's only you tonight, what you are, what you do, what you say.
- Tony: Today, all day I had the feeling a miracle would happen, I know now I was right.
- Tony and Maria: For here you are and what was just a world is a star tonight.
- Tony: [singing] Make of our hands one hand, Make of our hearts one heart
Make of our vows one last vow, Only death will part us now.
- Maria: Make of our lives one life, Day after day one life
- Tony and Maria: Now it begins, now we start
One hand, one heart, even death won't part us now.
- Tony: [singing] There's a place for us, Somewhere a place for us
Peace and quiet and open air wait for us, Somewhere.
- Maria: There's a time for us, Some day a time for us
Time together with time to spare, time to look, time to care, Someday.
- Tony: Somewhere we'll find a new way of living.
- Maria: We'll find a way of forgiving, Somewhere.
- Tony: I didn't believe hard enough.
- Maria: Loving is enough.
- Tony: Not here. They won't let us be.
- Maria: Then we'll get away.
- Tony: Yeah. We can?
- Maria: Yes.
- Tony: We will?
- Maria: Yes. [singing] Hold my hand and we're halfway there. Hold my hand and I'll take you there. Somehow, someday, some...
- Unlike other musicals ‘West Side Story’ grows younger!
- The Screen Achieves One of the Great Entertainments in the History of Motion Pictures
- Natalie Wood - Maria
- Richard Beymer - Tony
- Russ Tamblyn - Riff
- Rita Moreno - Anita
- George Chakiris - Bernardo
- Simon Oakland - Lieutenant Schrank
- Ned Glass - Doc
- William Bramley - Officer Krupke
- Tucker Smith - Ice
- Tony Mordente - Action
- David Winters - A-rab
- Eliot Feld - Baby John
- Tommy Abbott - Gee-Tar
- Jose De Vega - Chino
- John Astin - Glad Hand