You Only Live Twice (film)

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You Only Live Twice is a 1967 film, the the fifth film in the James Bond series, about Agent 007 and the Japanese secret service ninja force who must find and stop the true culprit of a series of spacejackings before nuclear war is provoked.

Directed by Lewis Gilbert. Written by Roald Dahl, based on the novel by Ian Fleming.
Welcome to Japan, Mr. Bond.taglines

James Bond

  • [Bond is about to have his chest waxed so he can pass for Japanese] Why don't you just dye the parts that show?
  • [about to make love to Helga Brandt] Oh the things I do for England.
  • [Coded message to headquarters] Little Nelly got a hot reception. Four big shots made improper advances toward her, but she defended her honor with great success.
  • [Bond has just sent Blofeld's henchman into the water. The piranha immediately attack him] Bon appetit!

Ernst Stavro Blofeld

  • I shall look forward personally to exterminating you, Mr. Bond.
  • [Bond is caught trying to enter the SPECTRE spacecraft] You made a mistake, my friend. No astronaut would enter the capsule carrying his air conditioner.
  • As you can see, I am about to inaugurate a little war. In a matter of hours, after America and Russia have annihilated each other, we shall see a new power dominating the world.

Others

  • Tiger Tanaka: I must say I am disappointed with the ease with which I could pull you in. The one thing my honourable mother taught me long ago was never to get into a car with a strange girl. But you, I'm afraid, will get into anything. With any girl.
  • Aki: I think I will enjoy very much serving under you.
  • Russian Diplomat: The world knows we are a peace-loving people.
  • Henderson: That was stirred, not shaken?
  • Foreign Secretary: As a matter of fact, our man in Hong Kong is working on it now. [cuts to next scene in Hong Kong, Bond is in bed with a Chinese woman]

Dialogue

[James is in bed with a Ling, a Chinese woman]
Bond: Why do Chinese girls taste different from all other girls?
Ling: You think we better, huh?
Bond: No, just different. Like Peking Duck is different from Russian Caviar. But I love them both.
Ling: Darling, I give you very best duck.

Miss MoneyPenny: Oh, by the way, how was the girl?
Bond: [turns the lamp towards her, interrogation style] Which girl?
Miss MoneyPenny: The... uh... Chinese one we set you up with?
Bond: Another few minutes and I would have found out.

M: [buzzing intercom] Miss MoneyPenny, give 007 the password we've agreed with Japanese S.I.S.
Miss MoneyPenny: Yes sir. [to Bond] We tried to think of something that you wouldn't forget.
Bond: Yes?
Miss MoneyPenny: "I, love, you". Repeat it please, to make sure you get it
Bond: Don't worry, I get it.

Tiger Tanaka: Permit me to introduce myself. I am Tanaka. Please call me Tiger.
Bond: If you're Tanaka, then how do you feel about me?
Tiger Tanaka: [the code response] I... love you.
Bond: Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way.

[Tiger is showing Bond a shooting cigarette.]
Tiger: It can save your life, this cigarette.
Bond: You sound like a commercial.

[Being bathed by Tanaka's women]
Tiger Tanaka: You know what it is about you that fascinates them, don't you? It's the hair on your chest. Japanese men all have beautiful bare skin.
Bond: Japanese proverb say, "Bird never make nest in bare tree."

Bond: [Choosing a masseuse] Well, I'll just settle for this little old lady here.
Tiger Tanaka: Good choice, she's very sexyful.

Tiger Tanaka: Rule number one: never do anything yourself when someone else can do it for you.
Bond: And rule number two?
Tiger Tanaka: Rule number two: in Japan, men come first, women come second.
Bond: I just might retire to here.

Bond: I want to take a look at the island now. Is Little Nellie here?
Tiger Tanaka: Yes. And her father.
[James, Aki, and Tiger enter a nearby garage where an agitated and a sweating Q is waiting]
Bond: Welcome to Japan, Dad. Is my little girl hot and ready?
Q: Look, 007, I've had a long and tiring journey, probably to no purpose, so I'm in no mood for juvenile quips.

Bond: Is this the only room there is?
Kissy Suzuki: Yes. That is your bed,
[points to one side of room]
Kissy Suzuki: I shall sleep over there.
[points to other side of room]
Bond: But we're supposed to be married.
Kissy Suzuki: Think again, please. You gave false name to priest.
Bond: Yes, but we must keep up appearances. We're on our honeymoon.
Kissy Suzuki: No honeymoon. This is business.
Bond: [pushing aside his oyster dinner] Well, I won't need these.

[Blofeld has demanded an advance payment of $100 million in gold]
Blofeld's Financier: Our agreement states quite clearly that no money should be paid until war has broken out between Russia and the United States.
Financier: This is extortion!
Blofeld: [shows his SPECTRE ring] Extortion is my business. Go away and think it over, gentlemen. I'm busy.

Mr. Osato: You should give up smoking. Cigarettes are very bad for your chest.
Helga Brandt: Mr. Osato believes in healthy chest.
[Bond eyes Helga's breasts]
Bond: Really?

Helga Brandt: [Bond is captured by Helga Brandt] I've got you now.
Bond: Well, enjoy yourself. [Brandt slaps him]

Blofeld: [shows the x-ray of the PPK to Osato & Brandt] Only one person we know uses this sort of gun. James Bond.
Mr. Osato: But Bond is dead!
Helga Brandt: It was in all the newspapers!
Blofeld: Rubbish. Bond is alive. Unless you killed him, Mr. Osato. Don't tell me you let him go.
Mr. Osato: I gave Number 11 the strictest orders to eliminate him.
Blofeld: And did she?
Mr. Osato: She failed.
Helga Brandt: [to Osato] You should have killed him yourself. You had plenty of opportunities...
Blofeld: This organization does not tolerate failure.
Mr. Osato: I know, but do you see I...
Blofeld: GO!
[Osato crosses the bridge over the water where the piranha are waiting]
Blofeld: [addressing Helga] Well.
[Helga starts across. Blofeld hits a pedal that causes the bridge bottom to drop out, sending Helga into the piranha-filled water. The lethal fish immediately converge on her and she is dead in seconds. Osato looks on in horror]
Blofeld: [addressing Osato] Kill Bond! Now!
Mr. Osato: Yes, Number One! Yes. Yes, yes.

Blofeld: James Bond. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Ernst Stavro Blofeld. They told me you were assassinated in Hong Kong.
Bond: Yes, this is my second life.
Blofeld: You only live twice, Mr. Bond.

Blofeld: The firing power inside my crater is enough to annihilate a small army. You can watch it all on TV. It's the last program you're likely to see.
Bond: Well, if I'm gonna be forced to watch television, may I smoke?
Blofeld: Yes. Give him his cigarettes. It won't be the nicotine that kills you, Mr. Bond.

Submarine Captain: Dinghy's on board, sir.
M: [referring to Bond in the dinghy] Tell him to come below and report.
Miss MoneyPenny: It'll be a pleasure, sir.

Taglines

  • Welcome to Japan, Mr. Bond.
  • You Only Live Twice...and "TWICE" is the only way to live!

Cast

External links:

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